Not much has been going on with us lately. Just the same routine different day. I am doing really well with school and have almost completed one year. I am so excited about that. I never thought that I would go back to school, but I am so glad that I decided to. It has been great for me and I think will set a good example for Noah. I am still doing daycare. I watch 2 kids and I enjoy that. It gives me something to do when Noah is at school during the day and they are really good kids too so that makes it worth it. I am also working on photography. I have a facebook page for Smith Family Photography and enjoy capturing memories. I am taking a photography class in October and am super excited. That only means that my work will get better. I am the 2nd Counselor in the Relief Society Presidency at church so that also keeps me very busy.

Chris is busy working, ROTC, and school. He is AMAZING. I am so grateful to be married to a man who is so dedicated to his school and his family. He is a great provider who makes it possible for me to stay at home. He makes sure that we have food on our table and a roof over our heads. He also makes sure that we can enjoy some of the simply things in life. He is just great. He is working really hard with his school work. His load this semester is killer. He is taking Organic Chemistry and that is really hard. He is also taking a Dental Prep class and is also doing an internship with a dentist in Salt Lake. His ROTC duties are huge this semester as well. He is a company 1st Sergeant and is super busy with that, yet he still manages to find time for me and Noah.

Noah is doing great in school. I am working really hard with him at home too so that he does well. He joined the Chess team at school this year and is enjoying that a lot. He is also enjoying his freedom of getting to ride his bike to and from school. I am very proud of him. He has been doing such a great job with it. I am so lucky to have such a responsible young man. I just signed him up for Wrestling which is from Oct-Nov and then I also signed him up for Basketball which is from Jan-Mar. He is also taking piano lessons again this year. This is his 3rd year taking. He has an amazing teacher. She is great. She is also our neighbor and we really like her and her family. Noah is also involved with cub scouts this year. He is a Bear.

That about sums up what is going on with us right now. Nothing exciting but it's our life.

a little update!

So I have been focusing my scripture study more around Prayer and Patience the past several weeks. I can honestly say I am feeling more at peace with my infertility issues. I love how the scriptures and talks by the Apostles really help when I need it. There is always a talk or a scripture that make me feel a little better. I LOVE IT! We have gone back to the doctor and this month we are continuing with clomid and then we are doing a billion tests with me and Chris to see if there is anything else going on. Prayers are much appreciated.

So because I am having trouble getting pregnant I have been a little down....ok a LOT down and with winter coming I need a boost. I always seem to get a little winter depression. Not anything huge just the hibernation and lack of sunlight sometimes make for long days. So I am hitting the gym 5 days a week and starting back on Weight Watchers. Hopefully by focusing on my health I will be less worried or focused on the baby making issue and then hopefully it will just happen. I have a great friend doing WW with me so that makes it a lot easier. I am hoping for a better month.

I am going to be an Aunt AGAIN!!!!!!!!!

Last Friday, I was having a rough day. I found out I was not pregnant again, so I just had a melt down. I am sooooooooo glad I did because it made the call I had later AMAZING!!!!! Chris called me and told me to call his sister. I called and found out she is pregnant. I was so happy. If I hadn't had my meltdown I may have taken it a little hard. Of course I would have been happy but I would have been sad too. So after having my melt down that morning I was apply to be truly 100% Happy for my sister and brother in law. They are both amazing people and I love them both so much and am so excited about the new addition. They are going to be great parents. I can't wait to go shopping for baby stuff. I just love it. Congrats to Steph and Nick Hammons. Oh and congrats to myself.......I AM GONNA BE AN AUNT AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!!! I love being an Aunt.

We had a visitor!!!!!!!

On Saturday there was a dog roaming around our apartment complex. Of course, Noah was feeding him bread and water, so when it was time for Noah to come in the dog followed. He made a pallet for him to sleep on out on the porch and Chris ran to the store to get him some food. Well, from the time it took Chris to get to the store and back, I decided maybe the dog should sleep in the house. We borrowed a baby gate from one of our neighbors and were going to lock him up in the kitchen. Well, that didn't work because all three of us are suckers for animals. So I got out one of our old comforters and put it on the couch. Noah insisted that he sleep on the couch to keep this dog company. Oh and by the way, Noah and his piano teacher who lives under us, named the dog "OREO". So Noah and Oreo slept on the couch. The dog is so sweet and completely house broken. No accidents all night. It was great. It is a shame we can't have pets because we would have kept him. All three of us fell in love with him. So Chris called the pound to see what we should do but they were closed until Monday, so Oreo stayed with us until Monday morning. I had to take him to the pound on Monday. I cried all the way there, I cried inside when explaining the situation, and I cried all the way home. Ok I also cried most of the afternoon. When Noah got home from school I had to tell him. He cried and so Noah and I cried together. I hope that Oreo finds a good family. He is an amazing dog and some family is going to be really lucky to have him.

Emma Smith - Never Had an Ordinary Day

I woke up this morning still a little down and decided to get on facebook. My cousins wife, Crystal, sent me this video. I am not saying I know how Emma Smith felt, but the words to the song seem to fit some parts of my life. "How much can one heart take? How much can one heart take?" I feel like that a lot. How much can I take? Am I strong enough to endure this pain? " you couldn´t let the world see you cry." I can't tell you how many times I just tried to put on a happy face so that the my friends and neighbors wouldn't know that I was dying inside. I wish I had the courage and strength that Emma Smith had. She had so much more to endure than me and much worse things to endure and she stayed strong. What an amazing women she is. I think when I am feeling down I will watch this video and try to think of the great things I do have and how lucky I am to not have to endure all the sufferings of Emma Smith. Thanks Crystal for the video. I really needed something like that today!

Frustrated!

I am so frustrated and at a point where I am just ready to give up. Chris and I have been trying to get pregnant for the past two years. He keeps telling me "Everything will happen on the Lord's time". I know that, but these past two years have been so hard. I could understand a couple of months, but two years? I am doing what I am suppose to....praying, reading my scriptures, fulfilling my church callings, going to church every Sunday, etc. so why am I not having any luck? I started clomid last month and thought "here's my chance" and then NOTHING. I don't know what to do anymore. I am tired of crying and being depressed but I can't help it. There are days were I just want to curl up on the couch and cry until I don't have any tears left in me. I know people are trying to be nice and comforting but I am so tired of hearing it will happen when it is suppose to. Usually this stuff comes from people who are fertile Myrtles. I am TIRED of hearing it. Chris is great and just lets me cry and he has given me a blessing and he is very considerate of my feelings but it is hard because he doesn't see it how I do. He isn't the one who is all emotional and can't think about anything else. He can continue on his day like any other day as I am sitting having ANOTHER melt down. I am tired of the waiting and the emotions. Why can't I just have a baby? What is wrong with me? Should I just give up? I don't know what to do but I also don't know how much more of this disappointment I can take. I just want a BABY!!!!!

Noah starts 4th grade

I wanted to walk Noah into his classroom on his first day of school. I have done this every year. This morning he said he wanted us to walk him in. I took my camera like every year and when he sat at his desk he gave me the look of "GET OUT OF HERE MOM!" I guess this is the last year I will have his picture taken at his desk the 1st day of school.

This is right in front of the school.

We are getting a little brave this year. Since we live so close to the school, Utah does not provide bus transportation. Last year we had a carpool to get the kids to school. This year with my daycare and crazy schedule, it is easier to not participate in the carpool, plus Noah really wants to ride his bike to and from school this year. I figure he is 9 years old and in the 4th grade. He is old enough. I may not be completely ready for him to do this, but he is and I have to let him explore a little bit. He did very well today. We met him at school so we could take him to his classroom and make sure he locked his bike up. Tomorrow he is on his own. Him and a friend will be riding together so that is nice.

I wanted to make sure that he had a good start to the day, so I made him scrambled eggs, toast, a banana, and some OJ. Starting off with a good breakfast is important and sometimes I think we are too rushed, so this year, one of my goals is to be better with breakfast. Cereal for breakfast is great sometimes but I am staying at home and want to give him more of a variety this year. Lets see if I can do this.

My new nephew!

Welcome Bentley Christopher Brandeberry. My brother Adam and his wife Ashley had their first baby on Monday August 16th at 6:48pm. Funny cause that is Adam's birthday too. Bentley was 7 lbs. 3 oz. and 20 inches long. He has a head full of hair and is absolutely adorable. He looks just like Adam. Everyone is doing fine. Ashley did a great job. I am so happy for them and am so excited to be an Aunt AGAIN! Congratulations to Adam and Ashley on their new addition!

New Goals!

I am turning a new leaf. I am making a bunch of new changes in my life and need to mark it down so that I can follow up on my success. There are so many things that I want to change in my life from emotionally, physically, and spiritually. I know this post is kind of boring so if you don't want to.....don't read it. I need this post mostly for myself.

***Physically:
work out every day for 1 hour. (except for Sunday)
eat right
drink plenty of water
take daily vitamins

***Emotionally:
take time for myself (even if it is only 10 mins a day)

***Spiritually:
read scriptures every day for 30 mins.
read Ensign every day (one article)
choose 1 uplifting book to read a month
have morning and evening personal prayer
attend the Temple once a week

I know all of these things I should be doing anyway. Some of it I do on occasion but not everyday like I should. I plan on using this plan for a few months and see how well I do. I hope by this I will become a better person physically, emotionally, and spiritually. I want to be in better shape and be healthy and I want to grow closer to my Heavenly Father. This is my 3 month plan. Wish me luck!

Happy Birthday to ME!!!!!!!

Well, it came around a little too fast this year. I am now officially 29! Next year is going to be a rough year. I will have to leave my 20's which I have thoroughly enjoyed. So much has happened to me in the last 9 years. I had a baby, got divorced, started working full time, made so many new friends, bought 2 cars, started dating one of my brothers friends and then married him, gained a new family, moved to Utah so that Chris could finish up his bachelors at BYU, I became a stay at home mom again, and now I am going back to school to get a degree in Elementary Education. There have been a lot of other amazing things that I have done in the past 9 years but those are just a few that have stuck out to me.

So I wake up yesterday morning and got completely ready for my day, because I scheduled myself and Noah to visit the dentist. (why I did that on my birthday I am not quite sure) So I then get Noah up and tell him to jump into the shower. I then proceed to our kitchen only to find a beautiful flower arrangement on the table with a card. Chris was suppose to be up most of the night studying and I guess he waited for me to fall asleep so he could run to the store. His card was so funny. On the front it has a picture of a guy pulling a card away from donkey. The inside said...."I hope you like this card...It's a little something I pulled out of my ass. Happy Birthday!" So funny! Then Noah and I go to the dentist only to find out that I have 4 cavities. How did that happen?????? So they filled 2 of them and I go back on Monday for the other 2. So my mouth is sore and I had soup for lunch, which ended up running down my chin because I couldn't feel half my face. I did get a good nap in because it was such a nasty day. It rained and stormed most of the morning. Great day to just relax. Then Chris made spaghetti, garlic bread, and salad for dinner and then we made a lemon cake with vanilla frosting for my birthday cake. It was so good. Right when we finished dinner we had a knock at the door. Chris opened it only to find 4 adorable kids and a blonde chick singing Happy Birthday with balloons. Sarah and he 4 munchkins brought me two balloons and two really cute cards. Mason picked one out for me that had a monkey on the toilet on the front and it says "It's Potty Time." Sarah said he picked it out himself. It was super cute. Then Sarah got me one with Shoes all over the front and it says "indulge you inner shopaholic." Sarah added a line to it "not really LOL". She must know me a little too well. It is so nice to have great friends and a loving husband and son to make my birthday the best day ever. I love them all!

Pictures are worth a thousand words

Some more family pictures! I am loving this new tripod. I think I am going to look into taking a photography class at some point. I really love my new camera too.

Family Pictures!

I am working on my photography business and so I wanted a tripod to get some really good ones of me and my family. So here are a few of the pictures that we took the other day. Enjoy!

Virginia take 2!

My mother and father in law took me out to dinner t0 Ruby Tuesdays. It was so much fun and really really good. I always have so much fun with them. I am so blessed to have amazing in laws.
I was also able to visit with my Grams. Grams has Alzheimers disease. She had no idea who I was but she was so sweet. I am really glad I was able to spend time with her. She may not know who I am but I will never forget the time we were able to spend with each other.
What kind of vacation would it be with out pedicures with my Virginia girl friends. Once again it was a blast. I love being pampered.
We spent Friday at Virginia Beach. I love Utah but we don't have beaches here. It was so much fun and Noah enjoyed surfing and stuff. He loves the ocean and isn't scared at all. He was trying to go far far out but I had to put some kind of limits on him.

Visit to Virginia!!!!

So we planned a last minute trip home to Virginia for me and Noah. Chris wasn't able to go because he is taking summer classes. So Noah and I left from SLC on July 6th at midnight to arrive in Virginia on Wednesday the 7th. We had a layover in Atlanta Georgia and then headed on to Raleigh North Carolina. It was cheaper to fly there instead of the Richmond Airport. So after flying for over 6 hours we had a 2 hour car ride to my parents. It was such a great trip. So the picture below is all the Brandeberry Grandkids so far. Bentley won't be here for another 4 weeks so he is not pictured. Emma (20months), Noah (9years), Brayden (4years), and Lexi (3years). They are all super cute. It was so great to see them all and Emma is talking so much now. She was only 8 months when we left last summer. Brayden and Lexi have gotten so big.

Noah went four wheeling at Mike's boss' house and when I went to pick him up he gave me a ride. I was scared that he would wreck with me on it. I made him go slow.
The picture below is me with my nieces and nephew. I was so happy to see them. They really are a cute bunch of kids!
I had my mother in law take me to see Papa while we were in Virginia. It was so good to see him and hang out and just chit chat with him. I think he really enjoys visits too.

4th of July!

Stadium of Fire! We were able to see and hear Carrie Underwood perform for the Stadium of Fire for free. We went to our friends, Ben and Mary Ann and sat on their roof. Josh and Jadey joined us. We also had a cookout at my apartment with just me, Chris, Noah, Josh, and Jadey. It was nice to have some family to hang out with on the holidays. The fireworks were great and Carrie Underwood was even better.

Noah and his sparklers!

These were the jets that went over when Stadium of Fire was getting ready to start!

Uncle Josh, Aunt Jadey, and Noah! We all had a great time.